The Written Review

Dis ‘n Land

This is a country so extra-ordinary and anomalous that understanding it completely would not be possible. The dynamics at play create variables so astounding that predicting what path this country will be treading in 5, 10, 20 years’ time would be a fool’s errand.

It’s true that no one can foretell the direction of America or China but it’s unlikely that much will change in the power structure of the planet in the next two decades. America will try cling greedily to what power it has and China will continue building its influence throughout the developing world.

This however, is no political temperature take. This is but a meek attempt at clarifying my own views of this unpredictable place I call Home.

I realised some years ago already how exciting South Africa is. Every day is full of hypocrisy, double-standards and violence. Every day is full of love, warmth and promise. Those with means live in a first-world bubble, those without can only look in with despair. There is shiny new Hope around this corner and stinky, retched hopelessness around the next. I say this is all very exciting because, well, it is. Which might sound insensitive but really all I mean by it is this: it’s unpredictable.

We’re well known for our unpredictability. One need only look at the fact that we didn’t resort to civil war in the late 80’s/early 90’s when civil war seemed the only sure bet. The proud and stubborn Afrikaners gave up power to those they violently oppressed for decades, we are home to arguably the most loved (or at least most respected) individual on the planet, we’ve hosted the biggest sporting event in the world after being told we couldn’t manage it and after 18 years of democracy, the country is still pretty sound.

No crystal ball could have predicted all that.

There is no clear answer to why we are so unpredictable. It seems that at every turn we manage to surprise the pundits, confuse the experts and give a big middle finger to anyone who says we can’t do something. It seems we have an innate ability to ignore reality, to disregard the conditions on the pitch and put on a performance that leaves people asking ‘did that just happen?’

I’m not trying to paint an image of South Africa as this underdog utopia where everyone lives comfortably and harmoniously. Oh no, for all our unpredictability at the grand scale, we have the crippling predictability of everyday realities like racism, paranoia, violence, poverty and ignorance.

We have treason trials for idiotic Boere who think killing a powerful black man will grant them access to a volkstaad. We have delusional Zulus who think they’re more important than their fellow men, the men who put them in power in the first place. We have a 1% largely unaware of the strife surrounding them, their only view into how ‘the other half’ live coming through a car window on the way to the airport, their thoughts wandering more towards their holiday than to how humans can allow other humans to live in squalor and hopelessness.

We’re no angels but we sure are conjurers  Out of this stewing, steaming mix, where flavours struggle to mix and things occasionally boil over, we manage to brew something quite staggering. Take a sip of our ‘kool-aid’ and you’ll see what I mean.

*The title ‘Dis ‘n Land’ is taken from a Van Coke Kartel song of the same name. 

Dear Bloemfontein

What the fuck? Seriously. 

I find it incredibly sad that there are men and women who are so absolutely petrified by the unknown that they feel the need to dictate to others what they can and cannot see or hear.

I can say quite confidently that the City of Roses is bursting with these people. I had it first hand living there for 15 years. It’s everywhere. Earlier this year on a visit to my parents, my brother and I were asked twice, by complete strangers, if we were from somewhere out there, beyond the bubble. Two pretty normal looking chaps shopping at Pick n Pay or walking in a mall seems to be too much for these people. The norm must just be such a depressing grey for guys like my brother and I to stand out.

I read today that RAMFest - a South African concert tour originating in the Cape and spreading first to Johannesburg and then on to Durban, Port Elizabeth and Bloem - has cancelled the 2013 Bloem leg of the tour. The result of a lack of venues. 

The reason for this lack of venues is rather sinister in my opinion. Religious groups have put pressure on venues, like the university, to ignore the prospect of a big, professional production. A festival that brings the best in local talent to towns in desperate need of exposure to the bands they see on MK or hear on the radio. 

The reason these bigots want to effectively ban RAMFest from the city is founded on the fact that the ‘RAM’ in RAMFest is offensive. A ram is apparently the devils favourite animal or is the official logo of the Horned One or something equally ridiculous. ‘RAM’ actually stands for ‘Real Alternative Music’. It’s an acronym people,  not a fucking mass murder.

Now, I do respect the fact that the people behind this witch hunt are a small group . They in no way represent the people of Bloemfontein. I doubt most residents are even aware that RAMFest was intending on coming to Bloem - so I don’t want to tar and feather them all.

The thing is though, this group is powerful enough to convince an institution like the University of the Free State to reject RAMFest. This after the university had agreed to host the festival. An email claiming the festival represented the Illuminati and satanism went viral. How can an relatively anonymous email making such 19th century claims gain such momentum in 2012? I don’t know about you but that’s fucking scary.

This was all surrounding the first attempt by RAMFest to put on a festival in the city in March 2012. The festival ended up in Mystic Boer, a renowned sanctuary for Bloem’s ‘alternative’ crowd.  

At least it went ahead though. The 2013 festival has been cancelled due to increased pressure from this group. Because of them no suitable venue will even consider hosting RAMFest. I can only assume they fear being boycotted and seen as Satan sympathisers.

In a city where the hills all have illuminated crucifixes and mega-churches welcome thousands of believers every Sunday I guess it shouldn’t be a surprise that a music festival like RAMFest is given a hard time.

What insults me so greatly about all this is the complete stupidity of the argument. The thought goes thusly: a ram is a symbol of the devil, the festival presents bands that play the devil’s music, the festivals symbols/logos symbolise allegiance to the Illuminati and your kids will be taken by Lucifer himself if they are exposed to this filth.

This is their argument.

It is so deeply rooted in ignorance and arrogance that it simply cannot justify respect. And yet it does.

I have no answers on how to fix this problem but I know it needs to be addressed. Part of me wants to let them continue festering in their own self-importance but the rest of me wants to simply smack them upside the head and give them a book that isn’t the bible.

RAMFest

Volksblad